What we are taught

In an earlier entry I mentioned that Pennsylvanian Eric and I tried to see live music in Indianola on our first night in the Delta. Although we had known each other for less than 24 hrs, I trusted this guy, who I thought was similar to me- probably because he is around my age, and from the same region of the country. I also made the assumption that Pennsylvania E was bi-racial (African American and white). On the 40 min drive from Cleveland to Indianola, I expressed my awe with the landscape that he was used to because he grew up in rural Pennsylvania.
Pennsylvania E was driving pretty fast and I made a couple of comments about his speed but tried to relax and not be so uptight. We pull up to the spot and immediately E begins to take pictures. The spot was on a residential block and there were a least five young men chillin' outside. I was feeling apprehensive and couldn't place exactly why. I had sensed that we were in a "different" part of town, but had no basis to confirm my safety. I was in a completely different place in our country and didn't want to use my experience to draw some conclusions about anything, since I knew it would be so skewed.
Inside, E immediately starts talking to people, ordering beers and in my opinion making himself a very clear presence in the room. Again I was uncomfortable with this...
It took me a day to really understand why..
As a young African American growing up in the North, I know that the legacy and history of the South (particularly the way blacks were treated by whites in the South) remains in me today. It begins with my distrust of strangers but doesn't end there. Learning how to function in a culture of brutality and cruelty has extreme effects, one is the freedom to ask questions.
Follow me here, I was annoyed with E and if you asked me why day 1, I would have said he was asking too many questions. How could he be so naive to put himself out there as an outsider?, and further more, who did he think he was asking so many questions?
I was indirectly taught that you don't ask questions. That things are the way they are and in order to survive you must accept them (at least on a surface level). Those that can excessively ask questions are in a place of privilege because they don't have to think about the consequences of their question asking. Those of us that grew up in certain communities have a looming threat of consequence always hanging above our heads and therefore observe first. I know I tend to be a little dramatic, but I felt like Pennsylvania E had put us in an unnecessary spotlight. At this point, things just didn't add up. Where did you grow up? Where are your parents from? I guess I was looking for something to explain his behavior. I eventually found a possible answer.
Maybe I was super paranoid and maybe I could learn something about fear and questioning from him. A nice, harmless friendly, inquisitive, nature doesn't necessarily always mean ignorance. At the end of the day we were safe and welcomed. Needless to say, we had a good time and experienced a taste of life in the Delta